January – Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

February – Couldn’t work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn’t fit into the typewriter.

March – Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months because the box said “2-4 years”.

April – Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

May – Couldn’t make Kool-Aid because 8 cups of water won’t fit into those little packets.

June – Couldn’t learn to water ski because she couldn’t find a lake with a slope.

July – After losing in a breast stroke swimming competition, complained to the judges that the other swimmers were using their arms.

August – Told her blonde friend to hurry when trying to get into their locked car using a coat hanger because it was starting to rain and the top was down.

September – When asked what the capital of California was: answered “C.”

October – Hates M &M’s because they are so hard to peel.

November – Baked a turkey for 4 days because the instructions said 1 hour per pound and she weighed 120.

December – Couldn’t call 911 because there was no “11″ on any phone button.

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