Business one-liners 95

To get something done, a committee should consist of no more than three men, two of them absent.

To know yourself is the ultimate form of aggression.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

Too light for heavy work and too heavy for light work.

Treat people as if they are what they ought to be, and you help them to become what they are capable of being.

Trust everybody…then cut the cards.

Try to be the best of whatever you are, even if what you are is no good.

Try to get all of your posthumous medals in advance.

Two heads are more numerous than one.

Business one-liners 94

Those most opposed to serving on committees are made chairmen.

Those who live closest arrive latest.

Those with the best advice offer no advice.

To achieve the impossible, one must think the absurd; to look where everyone else has looked, but to see what no one else has seen.

To attract maximum attention, it’s hard to beat a good, big, dumb mistake.

To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.

To err is human. To admit it is a blunder.

To err is human. To blame it on someone else is even more human.

To err is human. To blame it on someone else is politics.

To err is human. To forgive is simply not company policy.

Business one-liners 93

There is one big difference between genius and stupidity; genius has limits.

Things are more like today than they ever were before.

Things could be worse; suppose your errors were counted and published every day, like those of a baseball player.

Things get worse under pressure.

Things go right so they can go wrnog.

Thinking is hard work. One can’t bear burdens and ideas at the same time.

This “law” has been intentionally left blank.

This “law” was inadvertently left blank.

This is clearly another case of too many mad scientists and not enough hunchbacks.

This space for rent.